Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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