eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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