I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
