We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
where are my pants?
in the oven.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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