is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
