I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!