i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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