I never want to see another naked old woman again.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
