I bet he comes in French.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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