found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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