For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
