Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
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he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
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He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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