all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
