I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.