Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so. http://tfl.nu/3zja
  Replies (58) Good night (3817) Bad night (1224)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality. http://tfl.nu/y8py
  Replies (8) Good night (3456) Bad night (768)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop http://tfl.nu/llg8
  Replies (36) Good night (5834) Bad night (1714)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig. http://tfl.nu/u35s
  Replies (12) Good night (1941) Bad night (4970)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.

  (260): View more from Indiana

  He probs deserved it.

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Every good man does.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell. (260): He probs deserved it. (317): Every good man does. http://tfl.nu/4ma5
  Replies (32) Good night (5621) Bad night (1795)
• Favorite

  (409): View more from Texas

  white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (409): white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character http://tfl.nu/8uci
  Replies (13) Good night (6244) Bad night (969)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?" http://tfl.nu/niuk
  Replies (38) Good night (6930) Bad night (1210)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand http://tfl.nu/1ole
  Replies (8) Good night (4203) Bad night (985)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic http://tfl.nu/ciqa
  Replies (1) Good night (713) Bad night (2043)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night http://tfl.nu/v5ja
  Replies (8) Good night (2134) Bad night (1229)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse. http://tfl.nu/v3q7
  Replies (8) Good night (996) Bad night (2125)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like http://tfl.nu/plug
  Replies (19) Good night (934) Bad night (1930)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts" http://tfl.nu/m25q
  Replies (18) Good night (2253) Bad night (1021)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate. http://tfl.nu/ezsl
  Replies (4) Good night (1288) Bad night (432)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair http://tfl.nu/llhv
  Replies (1) Good night (405) Bad night (865)

Randomize