can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
