I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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