i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize