My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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