The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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