playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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