I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
