we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
