Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
