This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Randomize