Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize