Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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