I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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