she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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