talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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