So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
