I need help removing her.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize