I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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