Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize