had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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