I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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