he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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