just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
