So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Randomize
