dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
