NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
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Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
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I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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