Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
