last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I don't think brook has ever known best
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
