We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
