smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
