I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize