Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
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