ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
