ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Randomize
