dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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