thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
she was so not down for the gang bang
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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