yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
