Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
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